We believe the health and fitness space should be a welcoming one; being healthy is a journey, not always a destination after all. Everyone should feel able to explore and find what works to help them live a happier, healthier life so we’re kicking off a series of conversations with people with different perspectives on all things health, nutrition and fitness. It might challenge your assumptions, or even inspire you to try something you previously thought you never would! So, let’s talk about it.
MEET @AMYLEIGHTON
One of the incredible things about social media is the opportunity it gives for people to share different perspectives. Just by sharing your own day to day life, you can sometimes end up inspiring thousands. That’s exactly what Amy has done.
Amy is a mindset and confidence coach who works with people to help them overcome any limiting beliefs they may have and help them to shift their mindset in order for them to reach their future goals in their personal and professional life.
LET’S TALK ABOUT IT
MF – Can you explain a bit more about mindset coaching and how you feel it benefits people’s lives
Yeah absolutely, so often as we go about our day-to-day life, we are so busy going from one thing to another, it’s almost like that pinball effect when you’re bouncing from task to task. A lot of the time we don’t necessarily prioritise ourselves and time for us. Filling up our cup first before trying to help everyone else. This then tends to have a detrimental knock-on effect. So that could mean that you might not start sleeping well, you start questioning the decisions that you’re making, you start to feel really tired because you’re trying to help everybody else and not necessarily supporting yourself. It might be that all of those goals and dreams you once had, they suddenly all disappear. So ultimately when clients come to me, they say they’re stuck, they’re overwhelmed, and they’ve lost the joy in what they’re doing but they know they can get back there with the right support, which is where I can help.
So, what I do is I hold the space for them to connect back with themselves. I use three key words; ‘Content’, ‘Align’ and ‘Thrive’ and this is the framework that I work with. So ultimately, it’s supporting them to connect back with themselves and work out what is going on for them at the moment. What works, what doesn’t work, what feels good, what doesn’t feel good, what they’re doing through gritted teeth and what they really want to let go of. Then it’s helping them get clarity on where they want to be and assessing any goals they may have and thinking how good that actually feels and it is it something they want or is it an external pressure. Once we are clear on that, it is then about supporting them to make the mindset shifts they need and the practical actions and habits they need to be able to put into their day to day, so that they can then start moving forwards.
MF – Have you found that because of the pandemic, it has shifted change in people?
Yeah, I think there is a lot more awareness around people not wanting to put up with things anymore. I think people are wanting to make a shift and take a stand for themselves. You know, they’ve said they’ve been through hell and back over the last two years in one way or another. There is more to life than this, let’s do something about it. Life’s too short and people don’t want to go back to the way life was before the pandemic. So, whilst people are still in that period of transition, they want help to work out how to transition it so it is more sustainable, it feels good, it excites them.
MF – In terms of yourself, can you tell us what a day in your life looks like and what your healthy habits look like
I am an early riser and an early bed timer. I get up at 5:30am and I do this on purpose because actually I find it quite exciting to be up before the rest of the world opens. It feels like I’ve got half an hour or an hour before the sunrises and before everybody else’s day starts to be able to check in with myself and sort myself out first. That’s my non negotiable of the day. I get up, first thing I do is drink my electrolytes and then I will spend 5 or 10 minutes meditating or even just stroking the cat. Again, its that idea or just being present and not being on my phone straight away. Then, I have started getting into a routine of getting my journal out and writing out 10 things that I am grateful for that day. That might be something that went well the day before, it might be something I’ve got coming up that day or it might just be that I’m thankful I slept well that night. It’s starting to set my day up in a positive context.
I then get a bit of work done. So I tend to tackle the thing I have been putting off first and then get the admin done. Then I go to the gym or get some movement in or go for a dog walk. That’s key for me in the morning. Again, that’s one of my non negotiables. I do CrossFit 3 times a week, I go to the gym twice again and I go for dog walks. That is my time and that is my mental health and check in time for me and then I get on with my day.
MF – How do you think the links between mindfulness and how it helps with your diet and fitness goals help?
I think there is definitely a big link between those. It’s the idea of being able to be present with yourself both from a mindfulness perspective but when you’re working towards your diet and fitness goals, being able to check back in with yourself and make sure that you’re not taking on external influences from other people but actually, firstly the goals that you’re setting for yourself are your own goals and then giving yourself the confidence and the momentum to be able to do things even if they feel tough.
For example, I went to the gym a few weeks ago and I had set myself a goal of doing a 40kg push press and you know, I had set it the week before and I was a bit scared but I think I can do it and I’d said to my trainer I want to do it. I woke up that morning and I kid you not, I had a really bad headache, I was like I don’t want to go the gym, I don’t want to do it and I had to check back in with myself and go, what is going on here? What is actually happening? And literally, I had to coach myself and this is where you see the link between mindfulness and exercise.
What I realised is that it was fear that I wasn’t going to get that barbell above my head and so I had to mindset coach myself through this - me being scared about working towards this goal that I’ve set myself. Let’s work through this, let’s just take it step by step and get myself to the gym, get warmed up and let’s get to a place of curiosity and see what could happen. I might not do it but I might and let’s work with that assumption and let’s give it a go. So literally I was there doing it and I was shaking trying to get that barbell over my head but I did it and that was amazing and so I celebrated myself afterwards.
So you know, there is definitely that link between the two because when you’ve got these goals, when it gets tough, you’re able to come back to the present and really work out what’s going on for yourself and assess the situation. As well, if you’ve committed to 5 days at the gym or committed to a certain diet, you’re like actually that doesn’t feel good. If you’re really stressed at work, the last thing you might want to go and do is 5 days of HIIT. So, having the awareness and the presence within yourself and your body to go ‘I need to chill out a little bit’ and it might be that you do your HIIT twice this week but work is really busy and you need to do some yoga instead. You need to look after your mental health too so I think there’s that tie there as well.
MF – How do you apply your mindset and coaching principles to your health and well being and how has that helped transform your approach?
I have worked myself to burn out before because I’ve been told going to the gym 5 times a week is good for your mental health. So I’ve been really busy at work, I’ve been travelling around here there and everywhere and yet I’ve been trying to prioritise going to the gym for my mental health because that’s what I’ve been told to do. I’ve literally ended up with migraines in bed, I’ve ended up burnt out, exhausted, throwing up. I had one Monday where I was so exhausted from the week before, it was Monday morning and I went to the gym and I had to leave half way through my class because I didn’t feel well. I got home, I threw up and a lay down with my head on the carpet crying, with a migraine because I was so exhausted.
It wasn’t until I reached that breaking point that I realised this isn’t a good balance, this isn’t healthy. I work with someone on my nutrition as well and he’s very good at saying we need to add in some more of this, some more of that, some more of the other and it’s been really interesting him even just upping my carbs and just making sure that I am ok with my training and that I am doing alright. The benefits of that have been tenfold and being able to see the benefit of eating properly and sleeping well and looking after myself has gone across my gym workouts, it’s gone across my CrossFit workouts, it’s gone across my energy day to day, and I rejoice when he adds more carbohydrates in my diet and that feels good for me. So yes, if you’re not enjoying it then you are going to be miserable and that’s then not sustainable and you’re going to think what’s the point of even trying and then you get into that cycle of starting something new and giving up.
The biggest thing I have learned is, what works for somebody else might not work for me. By listening to myself and listening to my body, that has really supported me in my diet and fitness goals. That has been the key, having that presence and awareness around me and what I need.
MF – what would you say the essentials are for shifting a mindset?
I think making that time to connect back to you, I think that’s the first thing. Even if its just getting up 5 minutes earlier and spending some time with a coffee, looking out the window and just observing what’s going on outside. Or even 5 minutes meditating or deep breathing or whatever your ‘me time’ might be. As well as having a clear focus on where you want to go and why you want to go there and make sure that it’s something that excites you. Otherwise, if you’re trying to work towards something that doesn’t feel good, then you’re already on the back foot.
MF – what are the signs to look for if we think our mindsets are focused on the wrong things?
So a lot of the time when I work with my clients, they will come to me and say they know they should be doing this and they know they should be doing that but they just don’t want to do it anymore but there is something stopping them from saying no. It might be that that has come from previous experiences that did once feel aligned but no longer feels aligned. It might be that you’ve taken on something you said yes to through gritted teeth and you really don’t want to do it but you feel like you have to. The main thing there is trying to please everybody else and not having those boundaries and non-negotiables for you. So I think be trying to please everybody and doing what everybody else wants you to do, that’s definitely one of the things people struggle with.
It’s a bit like a domino effect. Once you start saying no to something and you make a little action for, example there might be a WhatsApp group that you’re part of that you don’t want to be part of anymore so you mute it. As soon as you start doing that, you know you might get up 5 minutes earlier so you’ve got that time for you or this week you’re going to check in half way through the week around your exercise regime to see if it’s actually working for you or if you need to change it up. Just by starting that little domino effect, it’s going to build up and up.
MF – what would be your number one item of advice to someone hoping to make that change?
Make the change small to start with and make it sustainable. If you want to change a habit or if you want to make a change of some sort, think about what that bigger picture idea is but then scale it down. For example, if you want to run a marathon what is the smallest first step that you can make consistent? It might be putting your trainers on and going for a walk every day or a two-minute run just to start with. It takes between 21 and 66 days on average to make that habit.
MF – In three words, what does healthy look like to you?
For me it means self-care. It means having a really supportive group of friends around me and it means getting that movement in on a daily basis.
LET’S TALK MORE
Want to join the conversation? If you’ve related to anything Amy has said, we’d love to hear more about it. Come chat with us over on our social accounts.
Looking for more personal experiences, expert advice or healthy food inspiration? Check out some of our other blog posts for more.
